After 40 years, my children want me to change my habits; It is causing me too much of stress

“My son and daughter-in-law have been working ever since the marriage, seven years ago. Being at home, I used to manage the house chores which I didn’t mind as it kept my busy and maintained harmony in my family.

But now, ever since the COVID scare, since March, they have been working from home and all the peace in the family and in my mind has been upset.

Since, they are home, it is but natural for them to get involved in chores and other jobs of the house--and then they end up either interfering or advising me or finding faults in the way I run the house.

And this makes it all very stressful for me. 


I am 65 years old and having been running my house my way for the past 40 years. It was okay with both of them, till they were going to office since any interference would have demanded their involvement. But now since they are home, they are constantly on my case.

“Why do you chop vegetables in advance? They lose their nutrition. We should chop them when we want to eat.”

“Why do we not wipe the utensils before putting them back into the cupboard. Water from it will spoil the wood work.”

“Why do you steep the tea so much. It is not good for health.”

And so and so forth

While their suggestions make good sense to me, they must also understand that at 65 years of age for me to change my habits is very hard.


It puts my brain into a tizzy and I end up getting confused and stressed and it slows me down hugely.

Also, the fact that there is someone always nagging, pointing out things to you, always telling you this and that about how you work, makes me anxious, feel irritated, and on the edge.

I wish they would stop and go mind their own ways.

I wish their office would open soon.

I wish someone would tell them that they can’t ask me to change my ways or habits to suit them after 40 years of my life.

I wish they would stop stressing me out so much.

It leaves me tired, drained. Sometimes when tempers fly, I feel insulted too…

They think me to be stupid and incompetent,” says an anxious Sudha Talwar who stays with her family in Delhi.