“Mama, I don’t feel like eating.”; “Mummy, will I ever get to meet my friends again?”

As stressful as the pandemic is for parents amidst managing work pressures, household chores and child care, 

Don't overlook or underestimate that our children might be getting equally stressed by it all and harbouring feelings of anxieties, insecurity, and fear.

 Seeing everyone always at home stressed, not being able to meet their friends, denied the simple pleasures of life such as going to the park or outside for an ice cream, the children though small are feeling the pressures of lockdown in their own ways. They are confused, scared and lonely. Not to mention, lack of physical activity which is making the restless.

And to top it all up—in our stressful situations, our little ones sometimes inadvertently become the punching bag. A carless mistake in Maths, a spill of water or just wanting to watch  the TV longer is enough to trigger  the anger In the parent who already is struggling with  a lot  of issues of her/his own.

A study shows that 61% parents have reported shouting, yelling and screaming at their children at least once ever since the lockdown was initiated. 

Here are a few questions that your child might ask repeatedly during the pandemic phase. The answers are the symptoms and suggestions that might help you understand your child’s thoughts and feelings;

 1) Mummy, I miss my friends. Why can’t I go out to play with them? Will everyone fall sick? The unclear picture of current times might make your child question about the current condition. According to the WHO guideline, it is important that you provide facts about what has happened and explain to your child about what is going on now. Talk to them as adults and give them clear information about how to reduce their risk of being infected by the disease in words that they can understand based on their age. Also, try to clear any kind of false information that they assume or think and re-assure them if any situation of illness occurs in the family. 

2) Mama when will we get to go out? When will the virus go away? It is important for you to be honest with your kids, during the pandemic, but manage the amount  of information you give out and the words you choose to communicate the same. Your child can sense fear and might ask questions or share that they're scared. If you brush  their concerns aside as irrelevant, it might lead them to overthink, look for answers on their own through unreliable sources, worry about the WHAT that they don’t know about. Instead, tell them the truth—about the uncertainty of the situation and that even you at times worry about it, but assure them that everyone is doing their best to keep us safe. Assure them that things will get sorted out and till then they all have  to stay together and watch out for each other.

3) Mummy, can you please sit with me? Mummy, will you watch the cartoon with me? Mummy can I sit with you? Many a time you might get busy with your chores and work and during these times your child may start feeling lonely which might also lead to depression if not worked upon. Some children may resort to tantrums or perform actions that might be harmful physically or emotionally to them in order to get your attention. Hence, giving your child the required amount of attention daily is the most powerful tool you have, especially when their other comforts such as friends, school, grandparents, cousins etc are missing from the scene. If you are too occupied at that moment, tell them when  you will be available next and then make sure you fulfill your commitment. Small actions such as these instill a sense of security in children.

4) Mummy, if I or anyone gets ill, will I have to stay away from you? I don’t want to stay away from you: This is the most common worry that your child might have, given  all the information floating around. They fear that if they get ill they might be taken away from you and vice versa. It is thus, important to help them with their fears by giving them correct information. Tell them the correct facts about quarantining and how the government will help you if you contact the virus. 

5) Mama, I am bored, will I ever get to go to school? I want to go to school and meet my friends:  Your child is used to following a set routine due to the school. And even during vacations and holidays, your child has the freedom of going outdoors and playing. Hence, being stuck at home your child might get bored and start feeling lonely. To counter this, create a new schedule and structure for the whole family. Keep to regular routines and schedules about small things and engaging activities like morning exercise, your coffee/tea and their milk time, play time, TV time and so on. Help them create new schedules in the new environment at home. Involve them in age-appropriate household chores. Assign work and duties to them. They  will be happy to know that they can make contributions towards lessening your burdens and that they have something to do throughout the day at home.