“You know the worst bit about my job--I belong to no one and so I am given neither the protective equipment for COVID, nor am I posted in a non-contagious ward,” says Mahesh Lal, senior sanitation supervisor at one of the COVID hospitals, Delhi. 

“As per the hospital policy, people who are directly engaged in potential infection sources are given the protective gear on priority--this includes people from my team, disinfection staff, cleaners and ward boys but it excludes me from this priority list since it is assumed that I only oversee these cleaners and not get involved directly into the job. But that’s not true at all. Given the increase in the cases, most of the times we are understaffed and so even as a supervisor I have to do everything that a disinfection staff or a ward boy in doing. But it is not listed under my duties and so I am not given the protective gear. I think this is highly unsafe and unfair and given that the supervisor working before me died of COVID due to infection while on the job.

Whenever a stockpile of the protective gear reaches us, it is first distributed to all the team members of the sanitation department, and rightly so, and only if some are left then it is given to the supervisors--which rarely happens.

The earlier supervisor, Kunti Rawat, died because of this only. He was very well respected and loved and I had worked with him also. He never missed a day of the duty and worked sincerely and ever-smilingly. He never complained and I think the fact that he never complained about not having the bio-safety overalls and the masks, he got the infection and within one week succumbed to it. It was a huge loss for everyone, but I don’t see anyone learning any lessons from this.

When I speak to the seniors or the doctors, they always tell me that Mahesh you know how it is; there is not much we can manage; just take precautions. But does my life only matter till the importance of my duty? Last week, the senior doctor, hearing my plea gave me a PPE set out of his own money. I was very thankful but I can’t go and ask him again for it. It has been a week since I am wearing the same PPE.

I wonder--if my life is important to anyone or like Kunti Rawat one day, if I die too, they will all say, how sorry they are and what a good worker I was and then forget me, hire someone else and move on. Is this what life is about?

Is my job even worth putting my life at risk for others--hospital management and patients--who don’t care about me and wouldn’t even know my face.

After Kunti Rawat, I was reluctant in taking the sanitation supervisor’s job but I was not given a choice. Will I meet the same fate as Kunti’s? Is someone listening to me?

Am I going to die one day while saving others, but for no fault of mine? I did not choose this option then why has it been put on my shoulders,” says Mahesh.