“Will my husband and in-laws like this recipe I have cooked?”
“What about my kid’s fitness since they can’t go out to play anymore?”
“My brother hasn’t returned the call yet. Is he safe?”
“Everyone’s putting pictures of awesome food they have cooked on facebook. I can’t even manage a simple chocolate cake. Am I lacking somewhere?”
“How come my friends are so active on whatsapp? I hardly get time? Am I a poor organizer of my work or incompetent?”
“Oh God, I missed the deadline for my child’s homework submission. What a careless mother I am!”
“I have to make the kadha recipe for everyone that I came across on the internet to keep everyone safe from COVID.”
A woman, be it a mother, wife, daughter, or sister, has an innate tendency to worry about everything and everyone. Right from health, wellness, food, studies, happiness, she assumes she is the sole guardian of it in her family. She wants her family to be successful - healthy - happy at all times and when something goes amiss, she takes the blame on herself. And COVID pandemic has just exacerbated this tendency of women to worry even more than ever.
The pandemic is not a woman’s friend in anyway. With the steady increase in the number of cases, deaths and the rate at which the infection is spreading, you, as the lady of the house, probably even want to control your family’s movements and habits in order to ensure their safety. You probably are ready to, and are doing, everything yourself, right from managing the household chores to stepping out with safety gear to get the groceries just because you don’t want any of your family members to get infected.
On top of this, you have number of WhatsApp groups and each group talks and shares articles and videos that scare you even more. And then to top it all is the worry about yourself. What if you get infected? Who will take care of your family? What if your child or husband or parents get infected? how will you live without them? You end up feeling extremely stressed, worried, anxious and might even feel hopeless and helpless. Constantly living on the brink of anxiety always is sooner or later going to have deep mental health impact on you.
But how to deal with this anxiety and yet not compromise your family’s health.
1. Give yourself a break: Realise that you have limited bandwith for work and chores. It is okay to serve ready-to-eat noodles as a meal once in a while, it is okay to delay the laundry, and it is okay to take a long bath for relaxation. There’s only that much you can do and so don’t try and be a perfectionist
2. Do not compare yourself: Yes, there are women putting up pictures of perfectly baked breads and cakes on facebook and instagram. Admire them but remember you are not one on them. Enjoy yourself and your individuality. Don’t fall for the rat-race.
Recognize your worth and not your shortcomings: You are the source of energy for your family. Revel and celebrate this fact. You don’t need anyone’s validations to value your worth.
3. Being anxious is fine, but be practical too: Realise that COVID is here to stay for a long time. And so you need to learn to live and survive with it. Makes rules for family members, install gadgets at home to help you with household chores, master the art of one-pot cooking, teach children and others to manage their own clothes—whatever necessary to survive this long haul.